Etiquette at the mini-mart

When you write on a blog enough you can afford to have a few entries that I like to caterogize as fluff. They aren’t really important but they are just fun to write. This is a fluff entry, I hope you enjoy it.

So since I have been home I managed to get a job at that finest of institutions, the mini-mart. I provide people with their cigarettes, lottery tickets, cheap milk and eggs, and over-priced anything else. Now you may be thinking at a place that you are generally in for no more than a few minutes you wouldn’t have to worry about ettiquette, but you underestimate the many impolite and generally lame things that customers do when they reach the doorway of my store. I offer two examples from just yesterday’s shifts.

Yesterday our server was down so we could not process credit or debit card transactions. We were cash only and that is bad in today’s society. We put up large yellow paper signs on the door and at the register informing customers of the fact and I waited for the backlash. And soon it arrived in the form of that scariest of creations, the stressed out suburban soccer mom.

She plants her milk, some M&Ms and some gum on the counter. I ring them up, tell her the price and she casually holds out her American Express Card, oblivious to the world. I inform her that it is cash only and why, and suddenly a bit flustered, she asks if we take checks. I inform her sorry, no we don’t. At this point a normal customer would 1) get out cash or 2) offer to put the milk back and leave. This woman informs me she has a three year old in her back seat. I have no idea how having a kid in your car will fix my server but apparently the woman thought it was worth mentioning. She than tries the check route again, complaining that she lives right down the street and lamenting the fact that if she uses our ATM it will take 2 bucks from her account. I stand there apologetically and awkwardly waiting for her to realize I am helpless to help her. Finally she walks out.

I then go to put the milk back in the rear of the store. Barely a second after I return from my milk errand she returns with just enough cash to cover her purchase. I am forced to annoyingly and sheepishly retrieve her products and ring her up. She complains about checks some more while I do it. Than after the transaction is completed and I’m excited inside because I think I have escaped from her terror she asks for one last thing: a bag. Dear society as a whole: when you have two things that fit in your pocket and a large thing with a handle, you do not need a bag. I bag her goods and than as she takes them she looks straight at me and with a smile says “Thank you!”

So there you have it. A classic example of what not to do at a mini-mart. Stay tuned for the sequel tomorrow.

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One thought on “Etiquette at the mini-mart

  1. HAHAHAHA….I love this one! I worked at Target for 4 years!! I have many of crazy stories, this was encouraging (?) to know that pretty much all retail is the same….I hope I never have to go back…

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